Qwerpline Ep18 - All Aboard

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Vital Statisics

Ep. 18 Titlecard

Date: September 29, 2016

Category: Qwerpline

Appearing: Graham Stark, Alex Steacy, Kathleen De Vere, Brendan "Beej" Dery, Ian Horner

Edited by: Graham Stark

Graphics: Graham Stark

Illustrations: Featherweight

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Description: QWRP is back! Property lottery is... "resolved", Edith jumps in to help, and Richter clears the skies.

Runtime: 13:33

Slogan: The Finest Burgers in Therpston County!

  • A product of Weiner Czar's short-lived attempt to get in on the slider craze by producing granulated burgers.

Sponsor: Dutch & Hutcheon Touchin' Escutcheon Use this handy shield shaped cover to protect, groom and style your pubic hair into it's ideal shape. Dutch & Hutcheon Touchin' Escutcheon, it hangs on by clutchin'


News

It's Buccaneer Days down at Nsburg Drive-Thru Automall, celebrating their 40th anniversary and the 20th anniversary of the banning of leaded gasoline. There's a chrome rush in the Shaughnessy River (not the Shaughnessy River II) after someone discovered a valuable set of vintage hubcaps. Between segments Graham and Alex grudgingly acknowledge Captain Toot-Toot's Seafood Buffet, which, as a result of the mix-up at the Property Lottery seven weeks ago, now holds the deed to the broadcast studio. Edith discusses the 19-way swap she had to organize after said Property Lottery; in the process we learn that she had to recover the deed to her own apartment, plus the studio, plus Graham's aunt's summer house, as well as convince the Nsburders Brown Thrum Conservation Society not to turn Richter's helipad into a bird sanctuary. Muriel the Old Wife has moved into a large 4-bedroom home in Raster Heights, while Michael O'Leary seems to have ended up with her closet.

The Arts

Nothing is going on in the arts this week.

Live on Location

Derek is down at the Nsburg Animal Sanctuary with Michael O'Leary (no relation). It is a sanctuary from animals.

Traffic

Richter is spending his day in the QWOPter shooting down small drones with a shotgun. He declares that mankind was meant to fly in machines with a single rotor (even though the QWOPter technically has two), rather than the four on a quadcopter, and promises that as soon as these pretenders are cleared from his sky he will happily deliver the traffic report. Graham and Alex are...skeptical.

Live in the Studio

Edith Slump is filling in as business reporter and interviews Orville & Wilbur Ronk, who are petitioning the Therpston County council to let them build a new solar-powered wind farm on the outskirts of Nsburg. It is difficult to follow as they both speak at the same time. They need $14.5 million to which Alex says no.

Trivia

  • Michael O'Leary (no relation) has numerous nicknames for raccoons, including:
    • Wash Bear
    • Trash Panda
    • Masked Furry F--k Beaver
    • Tiny Brown Thing Taker
    • Shuffle Cat
    • Dank Ruggington
    • Satan's Tanuki
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