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Qwerpline is a podcast from LoadingReadyRun recorded primarily by Graham, Alex, Kathleen, Beej, and Ian. It's "scriptovised" - first improvised by the actors, then later refined and edited. The podcast consists of a fictional morning radio show on the station QWRP FM, broadcasting from scenic Nsburg. The show is hosted by Graham ("Big G-Money") and Alex ("A-Train"), along with Derek the Intern (Beej), traffic reporter Richter Hammockslam (Ian), arts reporter Edith Slump (Kathleen), plus a broad slate of guests and local personalities. Art for Qwerpline is often provided by Featherweight.

A typical episode of Qwerpline contains segments on local news, the arts (with Edith Slump), local traffic (with Richter Hammockslam), plus a live on-location interview via Derek the Intern. Other recurring segments include the weather, sports, and the occasional caller who somehow manages to get through. Each episode begins and ends with a sponsor message.


According to LRRcast - AskLRR February 2016, Qwerpline is the fusion of Graham's QWOPline and Alex's Derpline, both of which were fake radio shows invented during Desert Bus. Alex put on a radio show in Desert Bus 5 entitled Derpline, the birthplace of the "A-Train" persona, where he did mock interviews with other members of the crew. For years after DB5 fans and callers continued to request Derpline, which led Graham during one of his shifts to put on QWOPline, a morning show equivalent of Derpline. One year later, both DJs joined forces and created the first ever episode of Qwerpline.

The biggest influences to Qwerpline predate the internet and are most notably: Firesign Theater, Proctor and Bergman, Cheech and Chong, Round the Horne and The Goon Show. Due to its success Qwerpline has been favorably compared to Welcome to Nightvale but the LRR crew considers Welcome to Nightvale more as a similarly structured variety show than an inspiration as they had little prior exposure to it. The similarities between both shows are coincidental and comparisons arise as a consequence of both shows being the only ones of their kind rather than the shows being more directly related.


For the full list of characters, see List of Qwerpline Characters.


  • Tom Mcgee's Chamonix Harmony - A French alps barbershop quartet.
  • Jack Plank's Sauna-Smoked Pork
  • Joss Ross' Boss Moss Floss - Candy floss made from all-natural sphagnum moss.
  • Chad McRad's Sad Pad - A topical antidepressant produced by Huffer Pharmachemicals. Apply to the underarm.
  • Johnny Jensen's All-You-Can-Eat Technically Meat Buffet
  • Slater-Foster Greater Roster Paternoster - A constantly moving elevator, produced in Gloucester, capable of moving entire field hockey teams from floor to floor.
  • Hetty Resetti's Spaghetti Machete - Billed as a tool made to "fight off" the hunger of an army.
  • Granny Marge's Man-free Barges - Luxury Shaughnessy River cruises available to everyone except men.
  • The Libertine Submarine Limousine - A "richly-appointed, man-only, watertight town car" which is "filled with luscious men" and apparently negates a need for sunscreen.
  • Mary O'Flaherty's Lairy Disparity - A bleak burlesque show exposing the frailties of modern life, the human condition, "and maybe some other things."
  • Great Height Freight Lightweight Flight - For when you need to get your small packages into space. Promises overnight delivery and personal satellite installations.
  • The Get Wet Dinette Set - A dinner table which also functions as a water park that is made from waterproof Chinet®.
  • The No-Strain Brain Chain - A Huffer Pharmachemicals product designed to protect the cerebellum from concussive head trauma.
  • Concise Device by Bernice Price - It works.
  • The Lougheed Tough Slough Plough - Thoroughly digs troughs through boroughs with great expediency, all whilst being "quiet as a hiccough".
  • The Random Phantom Bantam - Anti-fox ghost-chicken defense system for chicken coops that requires annual replacement.
  • Pastor McMaster's Cremaster Disaster - "The only archbishop-approved Catholic prophylactic." Produced by Huffer Pharmachemicals.

List of Qwerpline episodes

Season 1

Season No. Episode No. Title Release Date Link
01 01 Pot Hole Mystery 30 August 2015 YouTube
All of the nsburg potholes have gone missing. Plus, a preview of the films opening at the nsburg megaplex and an interview with local perfumer Ball Hinkley.
02 02 Damnable Dams 13 September 2015 YouTube
Derek reports on the grand opening of a restaurant, plus coverage of girls' field hockey, and concerned citizen Lorna Schlitzwhistle calls in.
03 03 Break the Banks 29 September 2015 YouTube
Full coverage of the newly-created Shaughnessy River II blocking traffic in and out of nsburg, leading to gas rationing.
04 04 Harvest Festival 12 October 2015 YouTube
Qwerpline reports live from the nsburg Harvest Festival via the QWRP Mobile Broadcast Van. Derek talks to some of the vendors.
05 05 The Several Rs 28 October 2015 YouTube
Things are calming down to relative normalcy after the harvest festival. Derek is on location at the recycling plants, and another citizen with complaints finds the phone number.
06 06 Founding Father 11 November 2015 YouTube
Derek has an exclusive interview with the founder of Therpston Country, Richter has traffic, and it's sideball season!
07 07 Debatable 1 December 2015 YouTube
The emergency by-election for new county Aldersm'n is well underway, no matter how disruptive it may be.
08 08 Fourth Quarter 14 December 2015 YouTube
Sadie's in with the weather, Richter somehow takes to the skies, and Derek goes back to school.
09 09 Rum Runners 18 January 2016 YouTube
Traffic and more from Richter, touring a historic site with Derek, and all the latest news from Nsburg.
10 10 Key To The City 2 February 2016 YouTube
It's news, traffic, and arts today on QWRP, plus Aldersm'n Alex has to take off for some civic business.
11 11 Contract & Release 18 February 2016 YouTube
The Secret Pipesmen are trying to take Alex to task, and Graham needs backup in the studio. Richter is fine though... broadly speaking.
12 12 Seemingly At Random 2 March 2016 YouTube
Don't worry about the explosions—Richter and Derek sure aren't. Plus, a sideball update!
13 13 March Marchness 2 April 2016 YouTube
It's annual coverage of Nsburg's biggest event of the not-quite-spring, the March Marchness Parade-Off!
14 14 High & Dry 27 April 2016 YouTube
Derek is out at Bumper Crop Farms, a special guest visits the studio, and Richter is... doing fine.
15 15 Recycling Amnesty 19 May 2016 YouTube
Kendra Tiltington explains the Nsburg Recycling Center's new initiative, Richter is broadly near Highway 3, and Derek is in the town square for an unveiling..
16 16 Full of Wieners 23 June 2016 YouTube
Edith's Book Club returns, Derek heads down to a favourite local wienerhouse, and Richter is also there.
17 17 Property Lottery 13 July 2016 YouTube
Darren von Spront is in the studio for an interview, Derek is on location at the Nsburg Property Lottery, and Richter calls in.
18 18 All Aboard 29 September 2016 YouTube
QWRP is back! Property lottery is... "resolved", Edith jumps in to help, and Richter clears the skies.
19 19 Flush the Grid 26 October 2016 YouTube
It's an Nsburg Tradition! And Richter, Sadie, and Derek are here too.
20 20 Dog Balls 25 January 2017 YouTube
The Pipesmen have a new--if similar--plan, Richter is despondant, and Derek is on location at the Dog's Ball.
21 21 The Winter Classic 11 February 2017 YouTube
Featuring news, traffic, arts, and a live report from the Sideball Winter Classic!
22 22 From the Waist Down 28 February 2017 YouTube
Derek is on location with some statuesque legs, Monty Cone talks sideball, and Richter makes some new friends.
23 23 Strike Week 4 April 2017 YouTube
An interview with the Nsburg OmniUnion, the latest exhibits at the history museum, and Derek checks out a new restaurant.
24 24 Poet Laureate 25 April 2017 YouTube
Derek interviews tabletop game creator Klaus D'Abrucio, Richter has strong opinions, and Edith interviews Nsburg's Poet Laureate.
25 25 Mystery Mansion 12 May 2017 YouTube
Edith fills in on sports, Richter is inexplicably okay, and Derek interviews a local heiress.
26 26 Don't Bet On It 6 July 2017 YouTube
An in-studio interview with Ball Hinkley, Richter's new flight, on-location arts reporting, and Derek interviews Bertha Burpwinter.

Season 2

Season No. Episode No. Title Release Date Link
1 27 Farmer Bumper's Cornhole 18 August 2019 YouTube
Derek is on location for the grand opening of Father Bumper's new and improved corn maze, and the Nsburg History Museum has a racy new exhibit.
2 28 Referendum 25 August 2019 YouTube
Derek takes to the streets gauge public opinion on the upcoming electoral reform referendum.
3 29 Weed in the Rum Tunnels 1 September 2019 YouTube
QWRP (and Derek) bring you live coverage of the explosive Burpwinter trial.
4 30 Birthday Season 8 September 2019 YouTube
Local inventors Darren Von Spront and Raphael Crinklestouf have large, airborne plans, and Nsburg Birthday Season is rapidly approaching.
5 31 Student Strike 15 September 2019 YouTube
The students of Raster Heights Academy are going on strike, and Derek has been begrudgingly located.

Non-Canonical Episodes

Episode No. Title Release Date Link
DB7 Desert Bus 7 - QWERPline 21 November 2013 YouTube
First Iteration of the morning radio show under the QWERPLine name. Alex and Graham call random viewers as part of the "good morning" show segment.
DB8 Desert Bus 8 - QWERPline 19 November 2014 YouTube
After establishing the basic format, Graham and Alex continue to call random viewers as part of their "good morning" segment. First live show to include other cast members.
DB9 Desert Bus 9 - QWERPline 19 November 2015 YouTube
First "non-canon" episode recorded after the show started its canonical series. While this episode is listed as "non-canon", its sponsor and some new segments were included in later episodes.
PAX West PAX West 2016 - QWERPline 20 September 2016 YouTube
First QWERPline episode recorded during a LRR Panel. Unlike previous canon and non-canon episodes, The "Live@PAX West 2016" episode has a 42 minute runtime.
DB10 Desert Bus 10 - QWERPline 17 November 2016 YouTube
The history of live Desert Bus Qwerpline episodes continues, including callbacks to previous non-canon episodes
DB2017 Desert Bus 2017 - QWERPline 22 November 2017 YouTube
Through scheduling difficulties Qwerpline makes an appearance at Desert Bus 2017
DB2018 Desert Bus 2018 - QWERPline 13 November 2018 YouTube
It's back again! QWERPline Live!

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