Poker Before Dusk
Can Elway catch the balls short of a flip pair, or will Lamont pull out an under-crutch moonsault?
Date: January 26, 2009
Writing: Graham Stark
Shooting: Graham Stark
Editing: Graham Stark
Vegas Footage: From "Trippin' Vegas" by Karl Klops | CC Sharealike
On Poker Before Dusk on Action 9, it is No Limit Viking Secrete Wild Card Poker.
TITLE OVERLAY READS
Action 9 Poker Before Dusk Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship Television Poker Tournement & Rumble
RICH: Welcome back everyone to The Kublai Khan Casino and Resort Hotel and Sports Bar and Spa here in beautiful downtown Las Vegas, where what stays in Vegas, stays in Vegas. I’m Rich Murdoch, and as always I’m joined by former Xtreme Poker Super Ninja Champion, Danny Freiberg.
DANNY: Always a pleasure, Rich. Today’s Cinderella story is Franklin Elway, a simple cattle mulcher from north-eastern Westbank, who has been surprising us all, all day long.
RICH: Darn right, Danny. Elway flipped the knob straight on a wide elbow in the first round, and caught the balls short of a flip pair with a narrow flush in the second. Let’s see if he can continue his streak and nut flop a tilt on his backhand here in round three, at our feature table.
DANNY: Well, we’re joining the table already in action, and the table is no-limit Viking secret Wild Card poker. Right now Elway is trailing 25-thousand to 38.6-billion against the newcomer, Desmond Lamont.
"POT" SHOWS $1000. CARDS SHOW UP AS MENTIONED.
RICH: Here’s the deal. Lamont gets an Ace of clubs and a Joker which doesn’t help him much, because of course in Viking Secret Wild Card Poker jokers are anti-wild, and may lead to a squashed spin if another one comes up on the flaps.
DANNY: Elway however gets a king of diamonds and Mrs. Bun the baker’s wife, so he’s already in a very good position for a spin flush.
RICH: Play is to Lamont, who bets 2000. Over to Elway who takes his time to see that bet. Both men check, and it’s onto the Knuckle.
POT SHOWS $5000. KNUCKLE TURNS UP A MAGIC CARD
RICH: No help to either player there with Elder Dragon Legend Vaevictis Asmadi.
DANNY: That’s a real shame for Elway, because Chromium might have actually helped him, despite his lack of mana. Looks like he’s still betting though.
ELWAY BETS A RUBBER CHICKEN
RICH: Elway bets the chicken there.
LAMONT BETS A MEMORY CARD
DANNY: Lamont sees the chicken with a memory card containing compromising photos of Gandhi and one of his followers. Both men check, and it’s time for the Flaps.
POT SHOWS "????". DEALER LAYS OUT FOUR VARIOUS CARDS
RICH: And look at those Flaps! The three of clubs, the eight of hearts, Sir Robin's Minstrels, and Colonel Mustard with the Candlestick. That really evens up the playing field. Right now Elway's going to have to decide if he should hold the Knobs steady, cut the straight along his outside Felch, or scrump all his Grits in one trug and go ahead with the check.
DANNY: Wow. Lamont is clearly confident that he has the better hand and he’s put Elway in a tight spot. I wouldn’t be surprised if Lamont pulls out a Full Under-Crutch Moonsault.
RICH: And Elway checks.
DANNY: And a spin from Lamont.
DANNY: Double Indemnity.
RICH: Elway taking his time here.
ELWAY: (Pause) Gargle.
ELWAY PUSHES ALL HIS REMAINING CHIPS IN.
DANNY: My god Rich, this is astounding! We haven’t seen a twist-flip-gargle play since 1972 at Constantine’s Palace! Lamont put Elway into a back-ended flip, and Elway did not back down!
LAMONT PUSHES ALL HIS CHIPS IN, AND THROWS HIS SUNGLASSES ON TOP OF THE PILE. THE POT SAYS "ALL OF IT".
RICH: This is the sort of hand every poker fan lives for. Both men have a roughly equal chance at this point, so it all comes down to the Pants Card.
DANNY: Here’s the deal…
DEALER TURNS UP A FOUR-COLOUR UNO CARD
RICH: And it is all over. Against all the odds, Elway has done it! He crunched a heavy Twist, let Lamont flip his gargle, and it completely paid off. The winner: Franklin Elway, your Super Mecha-Godzilla Viking Champion for 2008, and forever!
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