Forget About It Transcript

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Transcript for Forget About It.


{Scene opens with a device being operated, a flash and with Graham awakening}

Simon (Graham): Uh... huh?!

Memory Man (Paul): Hi!

Simon: Who are you?

Memory Man: I'm the Memory Man.

Simon: W-wait, what?

Memory Man: Right, so this is a memory wiper and I just used it to erase one of your memories.

Simon: What, why?

Memory Man: 'Cause you asked me to.

Simon: I did?

Memory Man: Look. You asked me to remove one of your horrible/painful memories; it's my job.

Simon: Oh, okay. Wait, how do I know this isn't an elaborate con or something?

Memory Man: Actually, for just that situation, we made a recording of you before the wipe.

{Scene pans to a recording of Simon}

Simon: Right, so just into? Right, okay. Umm, hi! If you're watching this... me, then I... then you just erased our memory. And if it worked, then we shouldn't... then you shouldn't remember it, uh, the memory, I mean. Because we erased it..

{Scene pans back to Simon and the Memory Man}

Memory Man: See?

Simon: Well that is me, but how do I know if the memory was erased?

Memory Man: Well do you remember it?

Simon: No?

Memory Man: Then it worked!

Simon: {Skepticly} I don't-

Memory Man: Look, just try to think of the most horrible/painful thing you can remember.

Simon: Uh, well, there's the one with the popsicle...

Memory Man: No you told me about that one and you said this one was much worse.

Simon: Well there was the one with the-

Memory Man: Scorpion?

Simon: Yes! And the-

Memory Man: Pineapple? No.

Simon: Damn. Hmm, well I can't really think of anything else.

Memory Man: So then it's gone!

Simon: Oh. Well. Okay, um, thanks, I guess.

Memory Man: Certainly. And here's my card, if you ever need anything.

Simon: Okay.

Memory Man: Oh, if you want to reverse, just call my office and Nancy will set up an appointment for you.

Simon: Wait, why would I want it reversed if the memory was so horrible?

Memory Man: /painful? Well, some people, they just don't have the willpower, you know? They don't want to spend their entire lives wondering what they may have lost.

Simon: Oh. Well, you don't have to worry about me. I have the willpower of a badger. It's... they bite down and they don't let go until the thing they're biting dies... Animal Planet.

Memory Man: Okay, you have a good day.

Simon: Yes yes, no you too, thanks.

{Memory Man leaves}

{Montage of Simon sitting on the couch nervously, and finally picking up his phone}

Simon: Hi. Hi Memory Man, this is Simon. I've, yeah, I've decided I want my memory restored.

{Scene shows Memory Man just leaving Simon's apartment.}

Memory Man: I- I haven't even... But, fine.

{Another flash and Simon awakens again}

Simon: Wha- Who are you?

Memory Man: I erased your memory, watch this tape.

{Scene pans to another recording of Simon}

Simon: Um, right, so we've done this now, um, what?

Memory Man: Five times!

Simon: Okay alright, so we've erased our memory and we should never ever remember it; it's too horrible. Under no circumstances try to get it back! Remember that really really bad thing we saw once? This is worse, trust me. Never get it back.

{Back to Simon and Memory Man}

Simon: Wow. What was the memory?

Memory Man: Shut up!

Simon: It wasn't the one with the popsicle-

Memory Man: No! Shut up! We got the memory, you will never remember it. Now, I am leaving.

{Ben enters just when Memory Man was leaving}

John (Ben): Hey, 'sup man? Hey Simon, who is this guy?

Simon: Oh hey John, he's, well, apparently I had to have a awful memory erased and he has a... he does that.

John: Oh yeah, the one with the spyglass, right?

Memory Man: Dammit, why would you?

Simon: I don't remember anything about a spyglass, no.

John: Well, yeah, and there was a toboggan... I got a video of it.

{The three watch the video}

Simon: Oh okay, alright. This doesn't seem that bad.

{Loud screaming while glass breaks. Simon is shocked, Memory Man is amazed and interested and John is giggling. Simon then curls up into the fetal position on the couch}

Memory Man: Why would you do that?

John: Meh {i.e. I don't know}.

Memory Man: Alright, delete that video. I have an idea.

{The final flash. Simon and John both awaken}

Simon: Wha- Who are you?

Memory Man: No one.

{Memory Man leaves}

Simon: Weird. Oh hey John, I got that spyglass, you want to go tobogganing?

John: Ah, hell yeah!