Qwerpline
Qwerpline is a podcast from LoadingReadyRun starring Graham Stark, Alex Steacy with guests. The most popular radio show on QWRP FM from scenic nsburg, Qwerpline is full of curious characters and local interests.
Setting
nsburg is a community in the rural United States of the sort where the pool hall is referred to as "Town Hall". The city's primary industry (or one of them) is turnips, and raccoon pelts have at times been accepted as currency. Two of its prominent neighborhoods are West Sump Acres, where the public library is located, and East Sump Acres, home to the sewage stream. It is located within Therpston county near the community of Jewelsburg.
nsburg is located on the Shaughnessy River, and for a brief time was also on the Shaughnessy River II, created after beavers dammed the main river. The Shaughnessy Highway runs alongside the river (and the Shaughnessy River II ran through the Shaughnessy Highway). Rather interestingly nsburg has been landlocked since the 1870s.
Highway 3 was home to nsburg's most famous and historically significant tourist attraction, the Berbeshire pot holes. Previously located on Highway 3 between Berbeshire Drive and Crescent Crescent the holes are dedicated by the mayor with celebrities who visit being given the key of the pot hole. The holes briefly disappeared causing much concern but soon reappeared on The Shaughnessy Highway after the Shaughnessy River II receded. During their disappearance there was some reports of suspicious holes on the Talcum Puff's field hockey field. Also at some point in the past the sidewalks of Highway 3 were blown up.
Underneath nsburg lie the nsburg Rum Tunnels Historical Site And Car Wash, where rum was once smuggled to both Canada and Mexico as early as 1763.
Events
- nsburg Harvest Festival - An October tradition with all sorts of local character.
Activities at the Harvest Festival include a Large vegetable competition and Pet show which includes such competitions as Freestyle Fluff and Synchronized Comb-Off. Many local businesses set up stalls to ply their wares. Parking can be problematic as there is a 2 hour limit. Presiding over the activities is the traditional Turnip Queen... who is the same nearly every year because it's a hereditary monarchy.
Slogans of Nsburg
- Home of the Tigers!
This slogan was adopted in 1965 when the tigers were unveiled at the nsburg Municipal Zoo. The tigers were returned to their owner in 1997 but the slogan is still used.
- Turnip Capital of Therpston County.
- The Jewel of Therpston County.
- City of Lawns!
This slogan was adopted when nsburg got its second lawn making it technically true
- A Capital City!
The definition of capital used in the slogan is its meaning of "excellent or first rate." This is because the capital of Therpston County is Jewelsburg not nsburg
- If you lived here... you'd live here!
- Where the sky meets
- The second best Miami
nsburg won the right to use the slogan after winning a sideball tournament against Lesser Miami in 1979.
- Get that Downe-home feeling!
Mayor's Announcements
- The last of the raccoons have finally been pulled out of the communal pool. Qwerpline Ep01 - Pot Hole Mystery
Segments
- News
Local news around nsburg.
- It's the Arts!
With Edith Slump.
- Traffic Qwopter
Richter Hammockslam gives the scoop on traffic.
- Weather
Sadie Casperson - QWRP Meterorologist
- Sports
With Chet Buntsman
- Let's Go to the Phones!
I thought we disconnected that phone.
Characters
QWRP Staff
- Graham ("Big G-Money") - Co-host of Qwerpline.
- Alex ("A-Train") - Co-host of Qwerpline.
- Derek the Intern - 19-year-old intern who is frequently sent out for on-location work.
- Edith Slump - QWRP's soft-spoken arts correspondent.
- Muriel, the Old Wife - Graham and Alex keep her in the closet.
- Richter Hammockslam - QWRP's traffic correspondent.
- Sadie Casperson - QWRP's meteorologist.
- Chet Buntsman - QWRP's sports analyst and former coach of the Talcum Puffs girl's field hockey.
- Jeff - QWRP's accountant.
- Clementine "Clem" Alberts - QWRP sports reporter
- Gus - QWRP engineer
Notable nsburgians
- Lorna Schlitzwhistle is a local expert on pseudoscience and the supernatural who keeps bees at her home in West Sump Acres. She runs an Etsy store which sells dreamcatchers.
- Jam Crone(place holder name) is a local purveyor of fine "jam" using recipes from the old country... most of which include ash.
- Ball Hinkley is a local Business Owner selling organic perfumes made from locally sourced items from around his home in East Sump Acres.
- Raphael Crinklestouf is a local inventor and advocate for alternative fuels. He has used fermentation of human and other waste products to run an engine.
- Officer Steve nsburg PD is investigating the disappearance and reappearance of the pot holes on from Highway 3 to the Shaughnessy.
- Dr. McFeels coach of the Talcum Puffs girl's field hockey.
- Dale Chuzzle (the Chuzzler) racer at the Dakar rally.
- Ralph of the nsburg Geological Society which is a fraternal institution.
- Granton Bumper from Bumper Crops. Entered a large Radish approximately 1 foot wide at the Harvest Festival competition.
- Richard Therpston. Founder of Therpston County and Therpston County Aldersm'n. Deceased.
Lorna Schlitzwhistle by Devin Harrigan.
Jam Crone by Devin Harrigan.
Ball Hinkley by Devin Harrigan.
Raphael Crinklestouf by Devin Harrigan.
Officer Steve nsburg PD by Devin Harrigan.
Granton Bumper from Bumper Crops by Devin Harrigan.
Happy Gunderson by Devin Harrigan.
Coach McFeels by Devin Harrigan.
Justice Zeff by Devin Harrigan.
nsburgian Business
- Pass N Gas
- The Nsburg Geological Society
- Tom Mcgee's Chamonix Harmony
- Jack Plank's Sauna-Smoked Pork
- Raymond's Talc Barn
- Joss Ross' Boss Moss Floss
- The Jewelsburg Diamonds girl's field hockey
- Chad McRad's Sad Pad
- Johnny Jensen's All-You-Can-Eat Technically Meat Buffet
- The Talcum Puffs girl's field hockey
- Slater-Foster Greater Roster Paternoster
- Deider's Beaters Used Cars
- Huffer RX
- Birk Scouts
- The "secret" Pipesman
Nsburg Geological Society by Devin Harrigan.
The Jewelsburg Diamonds by Devin Harrigan.
Johnny Jensen's All-You-Can-Eat Technically Meat Buffet by Devin Harrigan.
The Talcum Puffs by Devin Harrigan.
Birk Scouts by Devin Harrigan.
The Pipesman by Devin Harrigan.
List of Qwerpline episodes
Episode No. | Title | Release Date | Link |
---|---|---|---|
Pot Hole Mystery | 30 August 2015 | Youtube | |
All of the nsburg potholes have gone missing. Plus, a preview of the films opening at the nsburg megaplex and an interview with local perfumer Ball Hinkley. | |||
02 | Damnable Dams | 13 September 2015 | Youtube |
Derek reports on the grand opening of a restaurant, plus coverage of girls' field hockey, and concerned citizen Lorna Schlitzwhistle calls in. | |||
03 | Break the Banks | 29 September 2015 | Youtube |
Full coverage of the newly-created Shaughnessy River II blocking traffic in and out of nsburg, leading to gas rationing. | |||
04 | Harvest Festival | 12 October 2015 | Youtube |
Qwerpline reports live from the nsburg Harvest Festival via the QWRP Mobile Broadcast Van. Derek talks to some of the vendors. | |||
05 | The Several Rs | 28 October 2015 | Youtube |
Things are calming down to relative normalcy after the harvest festival. Derek is on location at the recycling plants, and another citizen with complaints finds the phone number. | |||
06 | Founding Father | 11 November 2015 | Youtube |
Derek has an exclusive interview with the founder of Therpston Country, Richter has traffic, and it's sideball season! | |||
07 | Debatable | 1 December 2015 | Youtube |
The emergency by-election for new county Aldersm'n is well underway, no matter how disruptive it may be. | |||
08 | Fourth Quarter | 14 December 2015 | Youtube |
Sadie's in with the weather, Richter somehow takes to the skies, and Derek goes back to school. | |||
09 | Rum Runners | 18 January 2016 | Youtube |
Traffic and more from Richter, touring a historic site with Derek, and all the latest news from Nsburg. | |||
10 | Key To The City | 2 February 2016 | Youtube |
It's news, traffic, and arts today on QWRP, plus Aldersm'n Alex has to take off for some civic business. |
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