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The Small Time Thieves are the main characters featured in Small Time, a Season Three weekly update. Bill and Morgan play thieves. They aspire to pull off great movie-style heists, but they are continually stymied by their limitations. They compromise for smaller and smaller robberies until the spoils of their heist are pitiful or nonexistent (from a vagrant's change to the contents of a lost-and-found box). Morgan's thief seems to be slightly smarter than Bill's, though Bill can summon a box of Timbits from Hammerspace. They appeared in the LoadingReadyRumble and despite their incompetence, they bested their kidnapper in I SAW What You Did There.