Bethesda Not Woke

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Stories on the NES Classic, Nier: Automata, Quake Champions, Layton's Mystery Journey, and Nintendo Switch sales.

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Date: April 17, 2017

Written and Performed by: Graham Stark, Kathleen De Vere, Paul Saunders

Story Graphics: Paul Saunders

CheckPoint Graphics: Graham Stark

Music: Bradley Rains

Produced by: Graham Stark, Paul Saunders


Bethesda has introduced a new Quake Champions character, and rejoice, fellow children, it's hella lit.


  • Nintendo has discontinued the NES Classic.
  • NierR: Automata is getting DLC that includes a boss fight against Square Enix and Platinum executives.
  • The new Quake Champions character is a tasteless attempt to capitalize on the Black Lives Matter movement.
  • The next Professor Layton game will be a mobile release featuring the Professor's daughter.
  • The Switch is the fastest-selling Nintendo console ever, but somehow more copies of the Switch version of Breath of the Wild have been sold than Switches.

Coming Up

In the single-player campaign for Battlefield 2 you play as an Imperial TIE Fighter pilot. EA said that they want to give the Empire a heroic figure, the same way as the Rebellion has heroes. Which seems like a great idea, since some people are really keen on being Nazis right now.


  • This episode aired on Easter Monday.
  • Graham does not hate Balloon Fight, but he still thinks it's a weird include on the NES Classic.
  • Kathleen is still playing Persona 5.
◀ ●∙∙∙ Mass Effect's Special Eyes       Player Now Known ∙∙∙● ▶

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